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Writing stuff

Been trying to write again lately. So here we go with something crazy I'm gonna attempt. Some of them seem pretty easy/fun, others are gonna take some work.

My hc_bingo cardCollapse )



Make myself happy?
Make someone else happy?

Seems like an easy choice. Not so fucking much in practice. Too bad they aren't both possible at the same time.

Cryptic is cool, I know.

Lists are cool.

Million things going on lately. Lists are fun and don't require detail so let's do that.

1. Heavily leaning towards 4 year school, but undecided. More research on what kinds of jobs I can get with a 2 year just to make sure I want to go through all the crazy of four years of school.

2. We might be getting a house soon. This awesome house two blocks away opened up at a great price that we are all in love with. We're working on the bank loan tomorrow. This house is seriously fucking rad. The end. I'll post pics if we get it under contract but for now, it's my secret. (By we I do mean my mom, my two brothers, the brothers sig other, and I. Yeah it's weird, it works for us though!)

3. I think I need to get top surgery sooner rather than later. I'm really beyond sick of the binder in the heat after 10 years and not binding isn't an option for me. It's just ridiculous. I can't afford the 6k for the surgeon I want but maybe I can squeak by with a good part of it and take donations for the rest.

4. If I pass the drug test and background check I will probably have a new job. (Part time at home answering phones) Depending on its hours I may or may not keep the current job. It's all kinda up in the air right now and I guess I have to be okay with that. Things will work out.

5. I want to write again and it's driving me mad. Inspiration fucking strike now please?

I guess that's it for now.


I'm not sure I even have the wits about me to write about all the things I experienced today but I will say that I'm glad I went to the counter protest and did all the things I did today. I am looking forward to going back and being able to get my hands dirty and help people. It was a really crazy experience and reminded me, in ways, of when I volunteered in New Orleans after Katrina. It's a beautiful city with beautiful people and coming together with them and just realizing things about life that you can't otherwise, it's big. That's about all I have right now.

May. 21st, 2011

Went in yesterday for my assessment tests for the job I'm interested in. I looked nice, threw on gray Dockers, a striped blue button up Polo shirt, and a yellow and blue tie. I figured I might as well milk what I've got and I've got good fashion sense when I bother to care. There were about six of us sitting around waiting and eventually they called us all back to some computers to take the exams. They were supposed to take an hour and a half to two hours. I flew through it, it was computer basics, customer service basics, call center basics, and some more advanced technical things. I was the first person done, I think it took me about 45 minutes max. So I let the lady in charge of testing us know and she checked my answers, let me know I passed (and that I pwned on the time it took to take it) She asked me to come back in at one to have an interview with a hiring manager.Collapse )

May. 17th, 2011

I have a job interview Friday. It's for a position with a customer service/tech support by phone place here in town. I'd be working for the HP division, helping people troubleshoot their laptops. I'm nervous as fuck, I really want to get this job. So I guess think some good thoughts for me while I freak out all week. :P I suck at interviews so that worries me. It has to go well. It just has to.

More testosterone talk? Surely not.

Someone asked me today how long I was on testosterone before and while I have the memory of a goldfish I got to thinking about how long a vial lasts and I'm pretty sure I was on a couple weeks of patches followed by about five months on injectable. In that five months I already had starts of a beard and a slight voice change as well as some anatomy change down under. In theory some of those things should fill out faster since I've done this for a while before and the changes never reverted.

Reason why this was brought up is my voice cracked taking orders at work today and it was fucking embarassing. But it was also pretty awesome so whatever.

So anyway I'm rocking a hell of a headache right now, I'll write more later.

May. 13th, 2011

So now that I'm not quite as much of a mess of social anxiety due to my awesome crazy meds I may change my major plan for school. I can get a two year Computer Information Science degree with mostly online work which will pay more than accounting two year and will also let me potentially be a programmer which is something I've always loved anyway. Considering that, probably gonna go for it. I'd have to take half a dozen online classes the entire two years and I think that I can handle in order to actually like what I do after school. Decisions decisions. With an A+ certificate on top of the two year I'd have even better hiring chances.

It's weird. I feel like I'm growing up. Which is awkward because I'm fucking 30 years old but cool at the same time. Getting on t, going to school, what's next?
I thought my weekly horoscope on Free Will Astrology was particularly awesome this week, considering. I'm gonna re-post it here.

Taurus Horoscope for week of May 12, 2011

Verticle Oracle card Taurus (April 20-May 20)
"If you wish to bake an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe," said astronomer Carl Sagan in his book Cosmos. In other words, the pie can't exist until there's a star orbited by a habitable planet that has spawned intelligent creatures and apples. A lot of preliminaries have to be in place. Keep that in mind, Taurus, as you start out down the long and winding path toward manifesting your own personal equivalent of the iconic apple pie. In a sense, you will have to create an entire world to serve as the womb for your brainchild. To aid you in your intricate quest, make sure to keep a glowing vision of the prize always burning in the sacred temple of your imagination.


T day T day omg it's T day

So I got my testosterone today and it only took an hour to manage to take the stuff after I got home. Wasn't bad, barely felt it in fact, pretty well a non-issue other than the fear of actually inserting the needle into my body. My doctor was really funny when she prescribed it, asking me little questions to see how much research I've done. It's like lady, I've been researching this junk on the internet for 10 years and living as male for about as long, I probably know more than you do. Course I just went with it. I did find a place in town that does compounding so even locally it's only costing me about $60 for syringes and a 10cc vial which lasts for months (I'm on a low dose of 100mg every 2 weeks to start, I'll probably ask to step it up to 200mg every two weeks at my next appointment if the doctor is cool with it). It's nice, I'm ready this time, not like living some random on the road life where I had no idea if I could stay on or off for long. I can really keep on the path I need to be on and feel right again. So fucking excited.

And yeah I know for all you transguys this is old hat but let me be a little bit stoked and annoying for a few months at least. I have more to say but right now I'm just in OMG I'm on testosterone energy. Maybe later, I'd like to keep some sort of log of changes as they occur here at the very least.